Triggers | Mark’s Remarks - Republic-Times | News

Triggers | Mark’s Remarks

By on March 4, 2014 at 10:37 am

marksIt’s always a good thing to do a little introspection from time to time. As usual, any time I do it, I start thinking about how silly I behave sometimes.

One of my biggest triggers has always been being around anyone who is acting “better” than everyone else. Anyone putting on airs. Anyone acting a little snooty.

You know the types. They delight in letting you know about their successes. They try to work their superiority into the conversation. They want you to know if they are related to someone important or that they live in the best part of town.

These same people turn their nose up to things like yard sales and using coupons. They make fun of people who they think are beneath them. They talk about things being “tacky” — on and on it goes.

But if the truth were told, I find myself doing this more often than not. I try to let people know how insightful I am. I look down my nose at bad manners or people who can’t be tidy. I calmly point out I am more in control when it comes to an argument. I let people know I have a few college degrees under my belt — on and on it goes.

But if the truth were told, I find myself doing this more often than not. I try to let people know how insightful I am. I look down my nose at bad manners or people who can’t be tidy. I calmly point out I am more in control when it comes to an argument. I let people know I have a few college degrees under my belt — on and on it goes.

Again, right back at me. These people bother me because I see myself in them. I see parts of myself I don’t like. I talk loudly; I keep talking louder and get more animated the more attention I get. I move around dramatically. I command an audience. I revel in the attention. Whatever it takes.

I don’t like it when people are too bossy. Some people who claim to be leaders are just downright bossy. They are impatient. They are control freaks. They get jobs done by ordering people around.

I’m bossy, too. I want things done my way. So that I do not come off as a bossy person, I often find ways to manipulate and get my way subtly. I’ve become a master at motivating groups of people and finding the best way to do something (in my opinion, anyway). I am a control freak.

When I am having a conversation with someone, I want their full attention. There have been times I have been talking to someone who will interrupt the conversation and change the subject, as if he or she was never listening to me in the first place. Sometimes, when this sort of thing happens or if the person I am talking to seems uninterested or sidetracked, I will curtly turn on my heels and exit the conversation.

I am not always a good listener. I need to be sitting in front of someone without any distractions. Some people bore me. Mundane conversation sometimes makes me want to hang up, even when I’m not on a telephone. I have little time for small talk and my mind often wanders.

I could continue with my list. But what’s funny is, every time I make a mental list of my “triggers” I find I am guilty of most of them myself.

Make your trigger list right now. Are you like me? Do you soon realize that, if you were friends with yourself, you might have a hard time getting along with yourself?

I think my friendship with myself would be on again, off again. I probably wouldn’t listen to myself much. I would ignore the bossy orders. I would tune out the loud, dramatic, attention-craving talk. I would balk at that Tullis guy’s air of superiority.

Heck, I’m sick of me already.


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Mark Tullis

Mark is a 25-year veteran teacher teaching in Columbia. Originally from Fairfield, Mark is married with four children. He enjoys reading, writing, and spending time with his family, and has been involved in various aspects of professional and community theater for many years and enjoys appearing in local productions. Mark has also written a "slice of life" style column for the Republic-Times since 2007.