Yes, you could call me hard-hearted Hannah (I wonder how people named “Hannah” feel about this moniker). I have a hard time understanding the fluffy stuff we have in our society these days. I have a hard time with the “that’s not fair” mentality.

Someone told me it was a sign of growing older. So be it.

When I was in kindergarten in 1972, I remember running home one day and asking my mother if I could take birthday treats to school. I explained that many of my friends had brought treats to celebrate their birthdays. My mother is not a mean woman at all, but she basically told me in not so many words: “Sorry Charlie, your birthday is in July. Kids with summer birthdays don’t take treats to school.” My mom didn’t qualify her statement with added fluff. She didn’t remind me how cool it was to have a summer birthday. She just told me the truth.

Since then, we have had numerous holidays created by Hallmark and all kinds of “make it fair” circumstances thrust into our society. Now, kids get to bring treats on their “half-birthdays.” Even my colleagues and I have celebrated my own half-birthday during lunch time. I feel a little silly getting a birthday card in January, but it’s a nice thought. Part of me wants to say “I have a summer birthday and am not allowed to have treats at school.”

I’ve totally written about this before and continuing to revisit this subject won’t change things. There is such a push these days to make things fair.  There is such an emphasis placed on every kid getting something. I think it’s going to cause huge problems when these kids grow up.

As a teacher and as a parent, I often tell kids another hard-hearted-Hannah-type fact:  “Life is not fair and you will rarely win. Sometimes you will win, but many times you won’t.  In fact, some of you will say that you never get to win. That is life.”

Of course, I’ve been conditioned to qualify my statement.  I tell kids we are all unique and special, and that’s not a line of bull: I believe we all have something special about us.  But we can’t go about thinking we all deserve or will get the same thing, the same treatment, or the same trophy.

We often play review games in my classroom. Invariably, some student asks “What do we get when we win?” Even if I plan to give the winners something, I always say “The satisfaction of winning, my dear child.”

In middle school, we have student government. For my students, it’s their first taste of how the political system works; in more ways than one.

The kids are handed a packet if they run for student office, and they have instructions on how to give a speech, how long it should be, and how to go about writing the whole thing.

Some kids prepare a speech ahead of time and follow the rules to a tee. Some don’t. This year, we have many capable and great candidates. However, only a couple of reps from each classroom can be elected.

This year, we had some flack from parents about the speeches and about some of the kids not following the rules. First of all, I was aghast; it’s only a little student-council election and I find it hard to believe parents get that involved. Sheesh! Of course, we as parents think our children are special and above board; I get that. We love them and we want them to feel successful. But really, folks?

One of the students who won the race got up and “winged it.” This person didn’t have a script, yet covered most of the key components of the speech packet directions. The speech was lively and fun; it was also given with a big smile on the face and it was given with enthusiasm.  The speech was made personal.  The candidate looked into the eyes of the voters. The candidate knew how to do it.

The students who fussed about the elections said this person did not follow the rules and therefore shouldn’t have won. Their parents fussed, too.

I disagreed, but it’s a touchy subject and you can’t tell parents the in-your-face truth about their children. You also can’t tell parents the kiddo who won was friendly and more personable than their child. You can’t tell them their child is exclusive and only talks to a few select people and even appears a bit “snooty.” You can’t tell parents that their child doesn’t smile much and would probably not be called “friendly” by their classmates.  Imagine telling a parent that! However, those are the facts.

Friendly, personable people who talk to everyone are the people who win elections and such. Sorry, that’s life. Learn to be nicer to everyone and you will win elections.

One of my friends said he could tell when I was in a sour mood by reading my column.  On the contrary, I’m not in a sour mood this week. I’m actually just very worried about our young folks. I’m worried about parents and grandparents who support this mentality. We are going to need a huge overhaul of our thinking if we think our children are going to grow up to be capable adults.

Imagine what our tomorrow is going to be like if we continue to make our kids think that they are entitled to everything just for showing up. Yes, it makes me angry, but it also scares me.

We gotta do something!