Christian bullies | Mark’s Remarks

I may have told you this before, but it has happened enough that it’s worth talking about again. I hope the adults reading this, if they relate, will step up and help.

A group of kids were overheard by more than one adult discussing their religion with a few other kids.  The kids discussing their religion outnumbered the ones who were listening.

The larger group began discussing their beliefs.  They talked about what they believed the Bible said, who God and Jesus were, and so on.  However, the entire conversation was done in a somewhat flippant, arrogant and superior tone as the other kids listened.

When the smaller group of kids began talking about their own beliefs and that they did not go to church, the other kids interrupted and began arguing and really berating the kids who were standing up for their beliefs.

Being in education for 30-plus years now, I will tell you that any time a kid comes to school talking about religion or politics, and being somewhat outspoken about the topics, the fodder for their conversation has come from an adult.

Now, some adults are good at what they do.  They teach properly. They guide their children and school them in ways to share their faith. Many children have good parents, good mentors in the church, and kind souls who point out what scripture says about how to approach and treat others.

So, to me, seeing and hearing what these kids were saying was a bit alarming. I pulled a couple aside later on and basically said, “Look, I don’t think your youth leader or pastor would like the way you were talking to your friends over there.”

The kids just looked at me.

Side note: Youth leaders, church leaders, parents and adults; please make sure you are talking to your kids on how to share and how to be kind about their faith. It’s important, and the wrong message is being communicated. I’m sure it’s not just in our school.

I’ve been a Christian for many years, and since I was an older teenager, have been appalled with the number of people in the church who are simply bullies. They use their beliefs to talk down to people. They build walls between themselves and anything secular. They use the “shepherd’s guide” and only patronize Christian businesses. They look down their noses at what people wear to church. They are cliquey and unwelcoming, seeming to be only worried about what they look like and how fancy their music service or church buildings are.

I am not sure some people are paying attention to this attitude.

Look, I want to share the love of Christ as much as I can. I’m not always a good example and I certainly spout off and talk out of both sides of my mouth sometimes. But I do know what’s true, and I also feel we have to treat others kindly and with a non-adversarial approach when it comes to sharing our faith.

Are you worried about your friend who dresses in goth makeup and proclaims to be an atheist? How do you suppose you’re going to share your beliefs and maybe get him to open up to you if you argue, butt in, and chastise him for what he believes? Is that what scripture says to do? We gotta figure it out and do a better job.

We also have to be a lot more transparent about being flawed humans. At times, my emotions and my fatigued body betray me and make me feel like a sorry excuse for a Christian.  But above all else, I sure believe we have forgotten how to love one another properly.

I know a guy who runs a college ministry. Without saying too much, he basically hangs out with a large group of people that are viewed as undesirable and different. He does this on purpose. He doesn’t shove things down their throats.  He listens. He helps where he can.

His ministry? Being a friend.  

When people in this particular group ask him questions, he shares what he believes and then asks them what they think. They take him on and try to get him to spar with them from time to time. He resists that urge. He calmly and lovingly just gets across the fact he cares for them.  Not with a haughty, “look how charitable I am” attitude.  He actually follows the overused catchphrase from a few years back: “What would Jesus do?”

It would do us all some good to try that type of approach, even on a limited basis. 

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