I get asked all the time how retirement is going. I retired a year and a half ago after 34 years as a classroom teacher, mostly with kids in grades 3–5, plus a sampling of just about every other age group along the way.

So how’s it going? Glad you asked.

I’m having a hard time, folks. I’ll just go ahead and be fully transparent. Being retired is weird. That’s the word I’ve been using since it happened. Weird.

I didn’t realize how much of my identity was wrapped up in being a teacher, or how hard it would be to switch gears. I’m not whining. I’m just stating facts. There’s a difference. At least that’s what I tell myself.

Don’t get me wrong. Walking out of school knowing I’d no longer have to deal with all the unpleasant parts of teaching was, and still is, exhilarating. I miss seeing kids’ faces, having conversations with them, and sharing their excitement. 

But there’s a whole other side of teaching that I do not miss at all. Extremely poor leadership and a growing number of people with very confused ideas about how to properly care for kids will wear you down. When teachers are questioned more about how they handled discipline than students are about their behavior, it might be time to take a bow and leave the stage.

Because teachers often retire younger than most, there’s also the small matter of finding your own insurance. So I always knew I’d need to do something on the side to supplement retirement income and take care of my family.

I jumped into a couple of ventures pretty quickly after retiring. They were valuable learning experiences, but not good fits. Jobs need dependable income, and dreams like starting a business or pursuing some grand idea don’t always work out right away. 

I remain optimistic. Maybe someday.

Beyond money and insurance, I’ve learned that I value working with the right people more than ever. After dealing with some strong personalities for a long time – mostly my own – I decided I’ve reached a stage in life where I try to avoid difficult people whenever possible. 

To be fair, there were far more lovely people than non-lovely ones in my career. But in the past two years, I’ve caught myself thinking, “I don’t have to put up with this anymore.”

And usually, I don’t.

There’s been a feeling in my gut that I can only describe as a soreness. Not physical – more like the discomfort that comes from not quite adjusting yet, not knowing all the ins and outs, and not feeling fully settled.

I remain optimistic. Yes, I know I already said that. I also know I’m impatient and maybe a bit selfish. I want to feel at home right away, and life rarely works on my preferred timeline.

My new job is with a non-profit organization. I travel a lot, make plenty of phone calls, and write a lot of cards. It’s rewarding and heartwarming work. The people I work with are honest, solid and respectful. The many people I’ve met along the way have been wonderful, and I’ve already made some inspiring connections.

So far, so good. I’m very thankful.

A few days a week, I work from home, which has been the biggest adjustment of all. It sounds great – and sometimes it is – but it’s not always as smooth as advertised. People in my house tend to forget I’m actually working, so I often retreat to a quiet corner. The home office we’ve made out of an extra bedroom is comfortable, but I don’t always want to sit there for hours.

As a result, I’ve developed what I call a “work nest” in the living room near the fireplace. Papers get stacked in neat, important-looking piles on the rug. The dog stared at me for quite a while the other day before I realized my laptop was sitting on top of the basket that holds his favorite chew toy. That one was on me.

All in all, this retirement life is still very much a work in progress. I’m trying to find the right niche, the comfortable spot, and a bit of even keel. I’m also trying to turn off “teacher brain” and remember I no longer need to live on a constant, low-grade treadmill of urgency.

Again, not complaining. Just reporting back to those of you who have asked.

If you’ve retired – or are thinking about it – I’d love to hear about your experiences and any wisdom you’ve picked up along the way. 

Feel free to share your ideas with me at marksremarks10@gmail.com.